Newsishy can report that Medbeds are finally here, we have seen them, we have used them and we are now in 100% health.
The new beds are being shipped out to wealthy customers from today with out-patient services to be operated from several cities for people who cannot afford the $400,000 cost of owning one.
After receiving treatment this reporter spoke to company rep Terisa Lyon and asked how the beds work:
“Trade secret I’m afraid but now you have experienced the power of our Medbed I’m sure you’ll agree they are incredible”
FEELING OF EUPHORIA
I have to say I do have a feeling of euphoria, what was the gas I was asked to breathe when I got on the bed?
“Oh, just an oxygen mix to calm you down, don’t worry about that.”
So now I’m cured? I’m not sure what I had to be honest, I’ve lived a pretty healthy lifestyle.
“That’s one of the amazing things about our Medbeds, they will diagnose any illness far before any other technology can.
We can see from your diagnostic scan you did in fact have 3 different types of cancer, a failing heart, gonorrhoea and you were starting to develop diabetes and epilepsy. You are a lucky lady, you found us just in time”
Oh wow! I had no idea, thank you so much. If I had paid the £2500 out-patient fee it would have been well worth it!
“You can’t put a price on your health dear”
Will this stop me from getting ill in the future?
“Unfortunately not, Medbeds can only cure what you have and not what you get in the future but every visit resets you and the good news is there are no limits to how many times you can pay to use them.”
Well we are convinced!
If you want to be cured then you can book an out-patient appointment on their website www.medbedsreallyworknotevenjoking.com and use the code “NEWSISHY” for a 5% discount paid in vouchers to be used on a return visit.
